Thoughts from a 4 year old

Sometimes I really wonder what goes through Kayden's little mind as he is asking me questions. He off and on gets into the why?? stages and we are in one again. I have been writing down some of the things he has asked me so I won't forget them and have been meaning to blog them for sometime. Our conversations are so funny sometimes. I think that the passing of Tyler has really confused Kayden but I absolutely love the questions.

When we were packing up our old house Brooklyn was crying and he asked me if we could leave her there in Wyoming and not bring her to Las Vegas.

Yesterday Kayden started whining a little (not too unusual for him it's usually a lot!) and I asked him what was wrong. He told me he wanted Tyler to come back and live with us. I explained again Tyler had to be with Heavenly Father but we would see him again someday (which is probably a really hard concept for a 4 year old). I asked him why he wanted Tyler to live with us again and he replied, "I want Tyler to smile at me again". Me too son, me too.

Kayden asked me one day how long do we get to keep Brooklyn? I was a little confused but told him we get to keep her until she's old. I asked if that was OK with him...and thankfully he said yes.

Kayden and I have had this conversation a few times. When Tyler was in the hospital for the last time we noticed that he had just gotten in his two bottom teeth. We told Kayden and he got to see them and he was excited to get Tyler a new fun toothbrush. Well a few days later he passed away. So now Kayden associates babies getting teeth with dying. Needless to say he is not very excited for Brooklyn to get teeth, and asks me if we need to take her to the hospital when she does. I'm afraid he thinks Brooklyn is going to pass away too.

I was washing towels one day from the bathroom awhile after Tyler had left us. Kayden asked me where the towels had gone and I told him I was washing them and he replied..."because Tyler puked on them??". I had really wished that that was the case but unfortunately it wasn't.

Before I had Brooklyn I was trying to tell Kayden that I would be going to the hospital, but that he could come and see me there and also get to see his new baby sister. He was quit confused by this and asked if Brooklyn was going to die. Poor kid also associates the hospital with death too. I hope that by him coming to see Brooklyn and I that he realizes hospitals are for really good things too.